So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
my poor anus
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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