i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
