Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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