i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
