True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
