also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize