Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
