Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I have aggressive nipples.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
It's shark week go big or go home
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Randomize
