I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
