Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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