I wish I could punch you in the face.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
