O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
