I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Everyone says I win the strip club
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
