I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
