Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
