I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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