I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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