I wanna bring you to show and tell
Fuck appropriateness.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
