I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Pants are for mortals
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
