one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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