yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
