dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
i now understand why vodka
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
