The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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