hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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