It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
