she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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