my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
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