The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
