hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
