Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
