I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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