Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
