Where are you?
In a non slutty way
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Randomize
