Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
