I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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