I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
