Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
time to smoke my breakfast
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
