I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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