Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i dont even know how to be here
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
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