Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
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