i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
