so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize