3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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