I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
