The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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