Betty ford says i'm here all night
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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