I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
