ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
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