It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
