i don't like sucking hair
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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